


How We Remember

by myscribblingquill



Category: Carry On - Rainbow Rowell
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Normals, Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, Coffee Shops, Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-28
Updated: 2015-12-28
Packaged: 2018-05-10 01:21:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,839
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5563282
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/myscribblingquill/pseuds/myscribblingquill
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Simon wonders how many times they’ve met, remembered each other. How many times they’ve never met or never remembered.</p><p>It’s odd to live in a world where you can remember your other lives but Simon and Baz live in one such world. Snapshots into some of the times they met.</p>
            </blockquote>





	How We Remember

**Author's Note:**

> I love reincarnation fics where they met again and again and Simon and Baz defiantly needed one!

There’s a hundred different ways that he’s been taught to introduce himself and “fuck your gorgeous” is not one of them.

Baz knew that if his mother heard him he’d be shouted at for poor manners but she’s not even aware that he snuck out to the heaving club. It’s the other side of town to the one he’s supposed to go to but he feels more comfortable here. There are no girls breathing down his neck or stroking his arm. The couple making out next to the dance floor are slightly distracting through.

Simon isn’t sure if he heard correctly when the guy next to him spoke. The club is loud and bright. He feels a bit out of place and his lights almost blind him.

He turns his head towards Baz, who takes a sharp breath in. Baz knew that he wanted to kiss the freckles covering his neck he just was aware that they spread over Simon’s face too.

“Sorry, did you say something?”

Shaking his head in response to Simon’s question Baz has to pull back a bit. He hasn’t had too much to drink but he’s drunk enough to start counting those freckles.

“I’m Simon Snow” He sticks out his hand toward Baz.

Simon’s not too sure how to act in a club and Baz can tell. He takes Simon’s hand though. Their palms are warm against each other and coated with sweat because of the heat of the club.

“Baz”

Simon nods but doesn’t say anything. He’s looking around the club with a curious expression. Baz wonders if he wandered in there by mistake but when Simon’s gaze draws slowly up his legs, a smile creeps over Baz’s face.

“Do you want to dance?” he inclines his head towards the packed dance floor.

There’s a moment of hesitation before Simon answers. “I think I’ll be more likely to break your feet than dance with you.”

“Let me buy you a drink then.” Baz says with a laugh.

They talk idly for the rest of the evening but don’t think too much of it the next day when they both wake with hangovers. It’s not until two weeks later that they realise they’ve spent two weeks talking together in a club so they go out for late night ice cream.

Baz later finds out that Simon’s not that bad at dancing. He needed a few lessons first but Baz still has his feet intact and Simon rather enjoys it. Penny teaches Simon that you don’t shake hands in club. She teases him about it for years much to his displeasure.

* * *

The morning rush becomes something that Simon enjoys after the start of his second semester at college. Being a barrister isn’t supposed to be enjoyable first thing on a Monday morning. It is supposed to provide everyone with their much needed caffeine boost for the day.

It becomes Simon’s favorite time because of one particular customer. Each Monday at exactly half past eight in walks Baz. He’s normally wearing a thick black coat that makes him look paler than he is but Simon likes the coat. It looks warm and Baz is always pulling it tighter around himself.

He orders the same thing every week so Simon almost memories his order. They don’t really talk, Baz looks too asleep for a proper conversation. So after a little while Simon starts to put notes on his cup.

_Get a scarf. It’ll keep your neck warm._

That’s what he writes when Baz comes in with a nasty cough. The next week there’s a a green scarf tucked in the coat and a satisfied smile from Simon.

When Baz walks in with a piles of notes tucked under his arm he gets a note saying, _highlighters will save your life_. Simon’s gets 10 fingers, each with a different color on them, waggled in his face.

The first time Simon gets a proper response to the notes is when he writes _‘Warm cookies might not fix the problem but they might make you feel a bit better’_. Baz had walked in with a very sour look but the next week he handed a bag of chocolate chip cookies over to Simon.

“I thought you could use some too” 

It takes over three months for them to talk properly. Normally their conversations are centered around Simon’s notes. A comment on the meteor shower the week before or a suggested cookie shop.

Slowly Simon works up the courage to ask Baz out, or at least give him his phone number. He’s sure that he’s wasted over 50 cups now by chickening out at the last moment. He’s tried every variation of _‘Will you go on a date with me?’_. None of them seem right.

Baz is the one to ask Simon though. He walks straight up to the counter, hands over a bag of fresh cookies and says: “Would you like to visit the best cookie shop in the world?”

Simon nods before Baz adds: “As a date”

That results in a a blush spreading over both their faces and a quick exchange of phone numbers.

Cookies ended up becoming their thing. They eat them on every anniversary. They make them too, although Baz nearly blows up the kitchen and Simon manages to forget half the ingredients.

* * *

Baz spends the years searching for someone named Simon Snow. It’s a damn stupid name if you ask him but he can get it out of his head.

Every school register, he listens for the name. He spends hours scrolling through Facebook trying to find the right Simon. Whenever he leaves his house he listens for the name Simon.

He’s actually met a few people with the name. None of them with Snow for a surname though. 

There was a Simon he met in high school but the guy transferred before Baz had introduced himself. Then one on the train. Another while he was out shopping. The list went on.

When Baz first mentioned the name his parents assumed it was an imaginary friend. Over the years Baz stopped mentioning the name Simon. He didn’t tell Agatha why he’d ran off the bus two stops early because the guy that got off was called Simon by his friend. Dev and Niall never find out either, it’s a secret Baz keeps.

That’s until his small town becomes too small for him. It feels like he’s being suffocated, the life sucked out of him. That’s when he starts running.

In a few years he manages to visit most of the world. Never staying in one place for too long. The people are new and refreshing. They have different view points and Baz finds himself challenging the way he was brought up daily.

The only thing he doesn’t question about his childhood is the languages he was forced to learn. Switching to Spanish or French without a blink means that he manages to keep out of trouble. He blends into the crowds too.

After a little while Baz develops a pattern. At certain points in the year he always ends up in certain locations. His birthday is spent in China, Christmas in Australia, New Year in Tokyo. 

Strolling along a beach in Spain, he thinks of his mother back in England, hoping that she got his card. Spain or France, they’re the two place he runs when everywhere else becomes too much. When every other thought is Simon Snow and Baz wants to tear his ears out so he never has to hear the name again. Not that he’s ever heard it said in the first place.

The beach is chilly so he tucks his green scarf into his coat and flops down onto a bench. If he shuts his eyes and concentrates on the sound of the sea perhaps it’ll drown out the voice in his head.

“Alright Penny, I know” a voice carries over the wind so Baz opens his eyes.

There’s a man stood by the sea, his toes just being touched by the incoming tide. Baz can see a smile on his face as he talks to the phone at his ear.

“I know what you’re going to say. Simon stop looking for him. Why don’t you come home?” the man mimics his friend but Baz isn’t too interested in what he’s saying. His thoughts got stuck when he said Simon.

“Pen look I’ve got to go. I’ll call you again soon”

When he hangs up the phone Baz stands slowly from the bench. His head is full of ‘what if’s’ but his feet are moving him towards the other man. 

“Hi, I’m Baz Pitch” he says in a quiet voice when he reaches the sea.

Simon turns his head to the left slowly and gives Baz a slow smile. “Not this time I see.”

“What?”

“Don’t worry about it. I’m Simon Snow” he sticks out his hand.

Baz shakes it and he’s hit by a wave of familiarity. Shaking hands is a Simon thing he realizes a few years later. He shakes hands with everyone, even if Penny does tease him.

Simon never tells Baz what that first comment meant.

* * *

They’re rivals, enemies, lovers and everything in between. Simon burns hot till his flame burns out and Baz is cold but they balance each other out.

Simon never felt like he belonged at Watford when he first walked through the gates. Sure he might be the chosen one but how is he supposed to save a world he’s never known about. That’s when he gets given Baz. The snarky room-mate that he’s stuck with for the next seven years.

Over time though Baz becomes a constant in Simon’s life, just as Watford does. Simon still says that he hates him even when Penny tells him to stop talking about him so much.

It’s different for Baz though. Having Simon as a roommate is a nightmare. He never knows whether he wants to run away from him or into him. When he gets too close Baz feels like he’s suffocating but when he gets too far away he feels like he’s drowning. Baz doesn’t know what he prefers.

They hate each other until they don’t.

When Simon has to spend his days without Baz he starts to fall apart. He maintains that the only reason he’s concerned is because of the plans Baz could be coming up with. Simon’s not sure if that’s more of a lie to Penny or to himself.

When Baz comes back though, Simon remembers how to breath properly, even if he feels breathless around Baz.

Baz still curses Simon’s stupid face and his moles and his freckles. He tries to forget all the dreams he’s had involving his roommate. He fails.

For Baz it becomes harder and harder to hide his feelings. He sure that if Snow wasn’t so bloody thick he’d have noticed by now. So the year continues with Simon believing that all Baz wants to do is kill him when Baz can’t get his mind off kissing him.

When they end up teaming up to solve the mystery of his mothers death, Baz decides he is going to kill Simon. He keeps asking questions and looking so damn perfect. Baz is sure he should have become immune to Simon Snow over the years but obviously not.

He desperately tries to keep his distance, calling him Snow and not saving his life more than once a week. He sticks to calling Simon ‘Snow’ because Simon sticks on his tongue. The name seems like it hold a million expectations and possibilities that Baz isn’t sure he’s ready for.

Somehow they end up saving the world. And each other. After Simon loses his magic but gains Baz, the world shifts for him. Watford seems like a dream, he knows it’s not though. If it was then Baz wouldn’t be sat with his hands wrapped around Simon’s waist.

“Did you finish the scones?” Simon asks, tilting his head back so he can look at Baz.

“Nope, there are still some left” 

Baz leans down to kiss Simon’s forehead before tightening his hands around his waist.

“Baz”

“Yes Simon?”

“I can’t get any scones if you don’t let me get up.”

Baz’s chest heaves as he lets out a small laugh “Perhaps I don’t want to let you get any scones. I like the fact that this sofa has no crumbs on it”

Rolling around so he can glare at Baz, Simon huffs but knows that as soon as Baz starts concentrating on the book in his hand his grip will relax so Simon will be able to get up.

“Here you go Simon” Penny walks back into the room will a plate full of scones and a lump of butter on the side.

“Penny I was trying to keep your sofa free from crumbs”

Penny shrugs as Simon takes the plate. “It was bound to get dirty anyway”

Simon just looks smug as he munches on the scones. Baz thinks to himself that no one is supposed to look that good while they’ve got butter and crumbs smeared over their chin.

* * *

The stars used to be far away dreams for humanity until they reached out a pulled them down. Baz always likes looking up at them as he walks to the library. The wind is cold and whips round the edges of the buildings making him regret leaving his coat at home. Picking up his pace Baz’s bag bumps again his leg but the warmth of the library warmth him through when he pushes the door open.

It’s the week before finals and although Baz isn’t too worried his flatmate is being annoying. The library is a better option compare to the music he’s playing.

When he reaches the corner of the library with his favorite seat Baz finally looks up from skipping through songs on his iPod. His seat isn’t empty. Not that it’s actually his seat, it’s just where he normally sits.

The boy occupying it is too skinny for his own good and Baz is sure he recognizes him from somewhere.

He sighs and takes another seat, settling in for a night of making sure he knows all the different star systems that have been explored.

Baz’s seat is occupied by the same boy for the whole of finals. He’s sure that the guy has started living in the library and then just before he’s about to leave for home the seat is empty again. Baz had gone to the library to return some books and thought to check his seat. It was empty which gave him a start until he figured that the guy had probably gone home for the summer.

He doesn’t think anything of it until the next term when he returns to uni. 

Entering the library Baz’s is fully ready to see his seat occupied but is pleasantly surprised when he sees that no one is sat there today. He sits down and pulls out his textbook.

“Sorry about last term”

Baz almost drops his highlighters over the floor as he turns to his left. The guy who had stolen is seat everyday for over two weeks was sat two seats down. 

“That’s ok” Baz replies with a smile. “It was finals and it’s not technically my seat”

“I know but ..” the guy shrugs but returns Baz’s smile. “I’m Simon Snow”

“Baz Pitch” 

He sees a shocked look pass over Simon’s face and is just about to ask why. That’s when the memories come back into his head. It’s like a flood gate has been opened and all of a sudden Baz remembers hundreds of other lifetimes.

“Simon” he breathes out trying to contain his shock. It’s taking all of Baz’s control not to lunge at Simon right now in the middle of the library. He’s forever banning Simon from wearing over-sized hoodies, he looks far to adorable.

“Baz, we ... we’re...”

“Yeah”

“But we-”

Baz almost starts laughing out loud, because it’s Simon. Simon Snow the boy he’s been in love with 50 times, the boy he’s kissed in a hundred lifetimes and he’s sat stuttering in shock in front of him.

“Come on, let go get some coffee”

They both stand too quickly from their chair, almost forgetting to pack up their bags. Their hands brush together when they pull the library doors open so Simon takes hold of Baz’s hand.

The coffee they get is cold by the time they end up drinking it so Simon makes a joke about the time he was a barista.

It’s seems impossible that this should happen to them. They’d heard the stories. Over 30 years ago the first couple had come forward saying that they met before in another lifetime. Their story had become an infamous one. Everyone had different theories about how it happened. Some said soulmates, other said rips in time.

Neither Simon nor Baz cared how it happened. Just that it had and that they found each other again.

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first SnowBaz fic so I hope I got the characterization right!  
> Find me on [tumblr](https://willsdarcy.tumblr.com)


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